You always admired that sweet girl from school; she is kind, polite, helpful and liked by pretty much everyone. You want to be like her, but you don't know where to start. Fortunately, there are many ways to show your sweetness: being kind and polite, being considerate of others, and not being rude or mean. This article provides tips and advice on how to develop the gentle behavior you so admire.
Method 1 of 3: Acting on That Goal
Step 1. Care for others
Part of being sweet is caring about others. This can be done if you show interest in people's lives, or by doing cool things for them. For example:
- Instead of talking about yourself, you can ask how your friend's day went. This will show that you have an interest in their welfare; if he says it's been a bad day, you can show your sweetness by buying him an ice cream.
- It's your friend's birthday. Unfortunately, the date coincides with the week of finals and assignments, so everyone forgets about him. You can surprise him with a cupcake, or with a balloon at school.
Step 2. Care about others
Being sweet is also caring about people and you must demonstrate that. For example, if you notice someone is upset, ask what's wrong and if you can do something to help. This will show that you care, even if the person doesn't want or need help.
Step 3. Always be polite
Another aspect of sweetness is politeness and courtesy, even with those you don't like. This means saying things like "please", "excuse me", "thank you" and "I'm sorry". For example:
- When someone gives a compliment, smile and say "thank you!"
- When you're eating at a counter and the salt shaker is far away, don't stick your arm in the face of the person next to you to reach them – ask: "Could you please pass the salt?".
- When you're in a hurry and need to get through a crowd, don't push people to make way. Instead, say "Excuse me, please" or "I'm sorry, I need to pass".
Step 4. Be generous
This doesn't mean that you should donate all your clothes to charity and give in to everyone's demands; there is a limit to generosity so that people don't want to take advantage of you. For example:
- Your friend forgot his lunch at home and has no money to buy in the cafeteria. You can share your lunch with him, or borrow money.
- When a colleague forgets his pencil or pen at home, borrow yours.
- If you suspect someone is abusing your goodwill, you can confront the person in a gentle, non-accusatory tone. For example, if that friend of yours asks for lunch money every day, say "Okay, I'll borrow it just one more time. I don't have the money to pay for your lunch every day. How about not forgetting lunch at home tomorrow ?"
Step 5. Praise others
This not only raises people's self-esteem and makes them feel good, it also makes you look sweet and kind. For example:
- When a friend gets her hair cut, tell her it looks good. She may be insecure or embarrassed about the change. Your compliment will be that little push her confidence needs.
- The boy who sits next to you in class draws all the time. Instead of saying he draws really well, mention some detail, like the character's eye or hair. Say something like "Wow, how well you draw! I love the way you made your eyes!"
- Don't overdo your compliments, at the risk of being irritating and appearing fake or weird. Your compliments should be genuine and deserved (or give that impression).
Step 6. Be helpful
Kind people are the ones who offer help first, even if it's not needed. There are many ways to help others, and most of the time they are small, simple gestures like opening the door. You can show your docility by offering help in many situations, such as:
- A girl drops notebooks and books in the school hallway. Instead of walking past her laughing (something a nice person would never do), go to her and help her collect everything.
- A boy is helping with the "Warm Campaign" at school, but has taken on more responsibilities than he could. He passes you with too many boxes and some fall along the way. Go to him and offer to take some.
- An elderly person in a wheelchair is leaving the cafeteria, but the door is closed; you can show all your kindness by holding the door for him and don't forget to smile and say "Imagine!" if he thanks.
Step 7. Use a softer tone of voice
Sweetness is associated with softness and gentleness, so try to tone it down and velvet it. Lower the tone and it will sound sweeter.
Method 2 of 3: Avoiding Misbehavior
Step 1. Don't curse or swear
Being sweet involves having good manners, which includes avoiding swear words and name-calling. When you get angry or upset (or kick a corner with your little toe), bite your tongue and try not to curse.
When you really need to curse, say common things like "Damn!" or "damn!". You can even make up funny words like "taropia!" or "caulk!"
Step 2. Don't insult, gossip, or kid people
Sweet people are kind and tend to like everyone – or act like that. Try to avoid insults, gossip and never, never be cruel. This is not only negative behavior, but it will also show people that you don't think such good things about them, which ends up making you an untrustworthy person: "if you talk like that about others, you should talk about me too".
Step 3. Don't react to name-calling and harassment directed at you
Instead, ignore the person and pretend you didn't listen. Bullies want attention and fighting back is exactly what they expect you to do.
Step 4. Don't bend over, cross your arms or put your hands in your pockets
Being approachable is a key part of being sweet and this is done with an open and receptive posture – sit with your back straight, head held high and shoulders back (but not so much that it's uncomfortable). Poor posture, hands in pockets, and arms crossed will make you look antisocial, disinterested, or bored; it doesn't even come close to being sweet.
Step 5. Don't use drugs or have destructive behavior
Drugs are harmful to health and vandalism can create problems with the police. Sweet people know how to behave, so they don't get into trouble; avoid participating in acts of vandalism, invasion and destruction of property (public or private), or drug use. Some hallucinogenic drugs lead to destructive behavior, while others can permanently deteriorate or damage health.
Method 3 of 3: Get the Looks Right
Step 1. Consider changing your appearance
Anyone can be sweet, regardless of appearance or clothing, but some images and styles tend to be associated with some personality types. The change can be as simple as smiling gently more often, or as complex as a radical makeover, including a new haircut, makeup and clothing style.
Step 2. Dress simply and modestly
Sweetness is associated with youthfulness, so avoid very revealing and sensual clothes. Choose simpler templates.
- If you're a girl, wear: a shirt with a heart collar and a knee-length skirt, or jeans and a peasant blouse, or a summer dress. Don't wear anything with too much cleavage or show your belly. It is possible to be feminine with a more discreet outfit.
- If you're a boy, wear: pants and dress shirts in neutral colors, or simple jeans and a T-shirt. Try not to wear inappropriate prints, tank tops, or oversized clothing. Your image should be sober and appropriate.
Step 3. Avoid wearing jackets and accessories with rivets
Again, anyone can be sweet, no matter what they look like, but some shapes are associated with aggressiveness; too many rivets and spikes can make you look intimidating and unavailable. Sweet people tend to look softer and more open.
Step 4. Consider wearing light colored clothing
Pastels, pink, lilac, baby blue and white are commonly associated with gentleness, purity and innocence. Wearing these colors can help people notice these qualities in you.
Step 5. Wear little makeup if you do
Docility is associated with youthfulness, this is achieved with little or no makeup. Use a light eyeshadow, a little mascara and light lipstick or lip gloss. Your makeup should be light and innocent, so stay away from more glamorous styles like smoky eyeshadow and red lipstick.
Make up your eyes so they look bigger, typically juvenile and innocent trait
Step 6. Have good hygiene
Sweet people are youthful and something very youthful is being healthy. You can look healthy by taking good care of yourself; this means showering, washing your face and brushing your teeth daily, as well as combing your hair and applying deodorant.
Step 7. Keep it looking clean
This will show people that you take care of yourself, which makes a more positive impression. Take care of yourself, your clothes and things; comb your hair, sew tears and slits in your clothes, wash them when they're dirty – this applies to everything, keep your things clean and tidy. For example:
- You can wrap your school supplies with contact paper and store them carefully so they don't form "ears" on the covers and pages.
- Make your pencils beautiful, don't nibble on the tip and keep them sharp.
Step 8. Smile
A good smile not only looks kind but also happy and it shows that you are receptive.
- If someone is mean to you, hold back the aggression. You can defend yourself without attacking.
- Eat something sweet! Studies have shown that eating sweets can help people develop gentler behavior.
- He used to smile. You will look nicer and happier.
- Understand the feelings of others to empathize with them more.