How To Get What You Want From Your Parents

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How To Get What You Want From Your Parents
How To Get What You Want From Your Parents
Anonim

Those who are young and do not have the money to buy what they want can always rely on their parents' good will… isn't it? Unfortunately, not always: many of them refuse to comply with their children's requests - and they need to be convinced. If that's your case, read the tips in this article and learn to persuade them with a good chat, at the right time, and honestly. It may even be difficult at first, but nothing is impossible for someone who is dedicated.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Convincing your parents

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 1

Step 1. Wait for the right moment

Pay attention to your parents' moods: they may be angry about their bad behavior, frustrated with problems at work, or sad that something happened with a friend or even at their wedding. If any of these possibilities are real, you'd better leave the appeal for another time, when they're content and relaxed.

  • They might be happy in general, but it's no use asking for anything if you've done something wrong recently and there's still tension in the air.
  • Don't try to ask for anything when your parents are swamped with things to do. Imagine if someone asked you to go to the market in the middle of your studies for your school exam! That would be selfish and frustrating.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 2

Step 2. Use positive, open body language

Smile, make eye contact and don't cross your arms. Using the right body language makes the whole conversation more friendly and increases the chances that you will get what you want.

  • Smile to show you're at ease despite wanting or needing something from them. Even they will be more relaxed.
  • Adopt a posture with your legs more open, arms uncrossed, back straight, and shoulders relaxed. This shows confidence, comfort and openness.
  • Nod your head while your parents are talking. Make eye contact, but not glaze over, to show you're alert and confident.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 3

Step 3. Show gratitude when asking

Nobody likes spoiled and ungrateful people! Imagine someone coming up to you and saying "Give me the gift I asked for!" Your will is to say "no", correct? So show your parents that you are grateful for all they give you and do every day.

  • Start by saying "Mother, you work very hard to give us what we want. Know how grateful I am for this."
  • Don't be disingenuous. It's much better to act honestly, without trickery.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 4

Step 4. Don't be playing green

Playing green, like saying "Dude, the Samsung Galaxy S6 is awesome! It has all the features I wanted in a cell phone…" doesn't do any good. Your parents may not even notice the reference (or worse: they do, but don't speak up). It's much better to be honest and to the point.

See an example of direct communication: "Dad, I want to travel to Rio to learn how to hang gliding." It's also good to cite a proactive goal, such as "Mom, I want a notebook to start writing more and working on web design before I get into college."

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 5

Step 5. Does not cover an immediate response

Don't expect your parents to say "yes" or "no" right away. Say "Mom, I'm going to ask you something, but don't feel obligated to answer now. Please think carefully first." That way, they will have time to consider whether or not they want to fulfill your request.

This strategy shows patience, as you are willing to wait a day or more. Your parents will be impressed and more inclined to accept

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 6

Step 6. Be persistent

If your parents deny your request, ask why - but without whining or grumbling. Keep calm and try to understand the decision. This shows maturity on your part, as long as there is composure and calm.

  • After your parents explain why they declined ("You don't contribute to cleaning the house," "Your grades are too low," etc.), ask what you can do to improve the situation. And get better!
  • Keep Calm. Maybe your parents are not impressed with your maturity and change their minds later on?

Part 2 of 3: Making a deal with your parents

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 7

Step 1. Plan your arguments before talking to your parents

Start thinking about what you want to ask your parents. Is it an object or an experience? After that, think about some basic questions: why do you want to? Why should your parents comply with this request? Don't speak to them until you have good answers, or your chances of getting it will be slim.

  • Think about your parents' values ​​before talking to them. This varies by family and culture. For example, some parents like to see their children take an interest in the family business, while others prefer that they do well in their studies, no matter what the field. Find out what works for your case and plan your arguments logically and effectively.
  • Prepare a list of "good reasons" for getting what you want. This will make it clear to your parents that this is not a simple impulse or desire, but an entire elaborate plan. For example: say that such a trip will contribute to your academic future or that such an object will make your life at home easier. You can also be more abstract and say that this item will do good to your imagination or the family as a whole.
  • Do not use irrational arguments or arguments aimed solely at your own benefit. For example: it's no use saying "Because so-and-so has one". No parent likes to see their children following fads without thinking! It's also no use saying "Because I want to", "Because I deserve it" or things like that. And don't even think about complaining and grumbling if your request is denied.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 8

Step 2. Research the price of what you want

Access store websites that have the product you want, such as Mercado Livre, Amazon and so on. If it is an experience, and not an object, look for more affordable options, including in terms of accommodation. Show all this information to your parents so they can see how prepared you are (and of course how much they can save with the right alternatives).

  • Estimate how long it would take you to put together half the total value of the product or experience, as well as how long it would take to put it all together. Share these values ​​with your parents.
  • Try to accept the possibility that your parents may not be able to comply with your request. On the other hand, you will be much more grateful if they accept. Be mature all the time, not just get what you want.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 9

Step 3. Be willing to contribute more to cleaning the house

Perhaps your parents deny your request because they think you don't deserve it. In that case, try to come to an agreement with them, how to contribute more to cleaning the house. They might not accept it right away, but keep your side of the promise anyway - maybe they won't change their minds when they see your responsible side?

You can be willing to contribute in a variety of ways: washing the dishes, cleaning the bathroom and kitchen, sweeping the yard, picking up the dog's poop, taking out the garbage, and so on

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 10

Step 4. Pay half the value of the product or experience you want

There's a possibility that your parents don't have the money for what you want - or maybe they even do, but they don't like the idea of ​​having to buy something so expensive that only one person will actually enjoy it. In that case, be willing to pay half the expense out of your own money.

  • Get a part-time job. If you are a minor, arrange a system with your parents where they pay for your help with certain services from time to time.
  • Save as much money as you can until you have enough to pay for half the product or experience. Talk to your parents and show how much you were disciplined during that time.

Part 3 of 3: Pleasing Your Parents

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 11

Step 1. Improve your grades

This is one of the best ways to convince your parents to comply with your request, along with collaborating better with cleaning the house. Do you have difficulty with a specific subject at school or college? Say you are trying to improve and show all your efforts little by little.

  • In the end, all your parents want is for you to be successful in life. Getting better grades is a clear indicator of this.
  • Try to come to terms with your parents. For example: they can fulfill part of your order if you reach a certain threshold in terms of grade; or bear part of the cost, if it is your personal experience.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 12

Step 2. Do what your parents ask without complaining

Many parents are frustrated when their children are disobedient and don't respect what they say. Behave well whenever they ask, even in simple things: tidying the room, taking a shower, etc. Your chances of getting what you want are going to be much higher that way.

  • Over time, start doing what your parents want even before they ask: set the lunch table, wash the dishes, clean the yard, and so on. They will be even more impressed by your proactive attitude.
  • Be patient in your strategy. Be consistent and your parents will start to see your responsible side little by little, which helps a lot when ordering.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 13

Step 3. Take on small responsibilities

These little responsibilities are similar to household chores, but the difference is that you can't make it clear that you're only taking on them out of obligation. Make yourself willing to fulfill certain roles in the house - and, in time, your parents will see how much your help is welcome and worth rewarding.

  • This type of behavior is considered adult and earns the respect of any parent. In the end, you end up contributing to your goal.
  • Take whatever responsibility your parents may have, but they are not in the habit of asking you to. Just don't choose anything that is way beyond your capabilities.
  • Common tasks (cleaning the house, taking care of pets, etc.) also work, as they contribute to the well-being of the whole family.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 14

Step 4. Contribute to your parents' happiness

You're not the only one with dreams, desires and needs: your parents do too. The more they achieve these goals, the more they will be willing to collaborate with yours.

  • Every parent is only at ease when they know their children are safe, away from risk. Be responsible at all times and make friends with equally trustworthy people.
  • Every parent also wants to be respected and listened to. Don't offend your own, even when you're angry. Listen.
  • Every parent expects their child to see him as a real person (which often only happens in adulthood). Try to get to know your family's life in depth to better understand why each one is the way they are and, thus, have a healthier communication.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 15

Step 5. Make your parents believe in their competence

In other words, boost their self-esteem. There is no manual for raising children, so many parents feel insecure about what they are doing. Show that your own did the right thing in your creation and be polite to everyone around you.

  • Talk to people, answer the questions they ask, and try to show a lot of interest.
  • Treat older people (not just seniors) with respect and politeness.
Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 16

Step 6. Don't complain

You may feel that you are being wronged and that you deserve to get what you asked for, but don't protest. If you want to say something, use a calm tone and be mature, without mumbling around in corners. That kind of negative attitude just kills your chances.

This goes for all your interactions with your parents. Nobody likes to see their children whining and complaining about how unfair life is! They might even get defensive with you

Get What You Want from Your Parents Step 17

Step 7. Be content with what you already have

Take a moment and think about what your parents have already given you. Take advantage of the gifts and experiences you've had access to, rather than discarding everything. Maybe you don't realize that you're already too happy with what's at your fingertips?

Tips

  • Show your parents that you are responsible enough to get what you want. Don't give them any reason to doubt your maturity!
  • Always plan what you are going to say in advance. Your parents will be impressed by your demonstration of organization and responsibility.
  • Do not scroll to order. Your parents will just get impatient.
  • Leave the request for after you've done something good that you can convince your parents that you deserve it.
  • Don't ask your parents for anything right after you've done something really wrong (not even if you're sorry). It won't work and they may even refuse to comply with the request any longer.
  • Don't ask for anything while they're fiddling with their cell phone or distracted.
  • It does not cover an immediate response. Make it clear that you have time and can wait.
  • The more you ask, the more they will think about it. Just don't overdo it! Repeat the request on your birthday, Christmas, and other anniversaries, not ordinary, random days.
  • Be confident. You'll probably be nervous about ordering, but don't worry so much.
  • Speak clearly and don't stare at the ground. Your parents will better understand what you want.

Notices

  • It's no use being polite and helpful just to get what you want and then go back to acting selfishly.
  • It may be that you want something that is not suitable for your age. In that case, there's not much you can do: it's better to let go and think about something else.
  • It's no use begging.

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