Fantasies can be an escape to happier places and times, but if you find yourself dreaming more than living, maybe it's time to stop. Since fantasizing can be an escape mechanism from reality, you need to identify and deal with the source of the daydreams. Make an effort to redirect your thoughts and increase concentration, becoming more focused and alert. However, fantasies can be productive if channeled to increase day-to-day proactivity.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Identifying the Root of Fantasies
Step 1. Keep a costume journal
Writing down fantasies and daydreams can help you discover why they exist. In addition, the act of writing helps to get out of the unreal world, creating a channel to unleash creativity. Immerse yourself in the details as much as possible.
- Try to find out if such thoughts reveal any dissatisfaction or unfulfilled desires in your life. For example, if fantasies are often sexual in character, you may miss intimate moments.
- Look for repetitions of themes in the journal. If all the notes are about getting a better job or getting recognized in your field, the fantasies might be related to ambitions.
Step 2. Learn more about what triggers them
Sometimes you can get lost in fantasies when music is playing or while you are doing something, like driving. When you notice your mind wandering, note the time and activity. Triggers can be:
- A place, like the workplace, in the shower or in the car.
- A style of music or a sound.
- An activity, such as a work meeting or a dog walk.
- A person, such as a troubled partner or a family member.
Step 3. Keep track of your time if you daydream while procrastinating
Digressing can be a way of postponing necessary tasks. If you fantasize to avoid work or to put off something you have to do a few times, some time management devices can be helpful.
- Make a schedule to keep up with daily activities.
- Prioritize tasks at the start of the day to ensure they are completed.
- Avoid overloading yourself with multiple tasks, as this makes it difficult to concentrate.
Step 4. Take up a new hobby if you're bored
If fantasy is a way to escape a tedious reality, you may need to adopt a new hobby or creative outlet. Writing in a journal, creating short stories or painting can be a great option. More active hobbies such as sport or mountain climbing can make life more exciting.
Step 5. Resolve relationship issues to stop romantic fantasies
If sex or romance is a constant theme, you may be unhappy in your current relationship. Try to find out which areas you are not satisfied with so that you can improve, whether you are single or committed.
- If you are in a relationship and keep thinking about other partners, consider whether you really want to stay with the person. If so, couples therapy can help.
- Look for someone available in apps or on dating sites if you're obsessed with impossible partners, like a celebrity or a married person.
Method 2 of 3: Improving Concentration
Step 1. Change the routine
You are more likely to immerse yourself in this parallel world during unimportant tasks like washing dishes. Instead of always adopting the same routine and doing things in the same order every day, vary from time to time. Thus, your daily life becomes more animated and your brain more focused and attentive.
For example, if you are in the habit of waking up, exercising, having lunch and cleaning the house every Sunday, try doing it differently. Eat out, exercise at night, or clean up as soon as you wake up
Step 2. Redirect attention when the mind starts to wander
When you catch yourself, try to stop your thoughts. Shift attention away from the fantasy by doing a different task or focusing on something else.
- To break the daydream, get up and do a stretch or simple exercises such as jumping jacks.
- Start focusing on objects around you, such as a paperweight or cup. Note small details, touch the object to know the texture. Thus, it is possible to have more attention.
Step 3. Practice mindful meditation
This type of meditation brings a person into the present moment, helping them to focus on sensations. Sit in a comfortable chair and breathe deeply. Just focus on the sensation the breath causes, and if the mind starts to wander, stop and focus again on the breath.
- Start with short sessions of about 10 minutes and expand.
- You can also expand awareness to other sensory details. What are you playing? Is there a smell in the air? Is there any sound in the environment?
Step 4. Take breaks between each activity
The brain can only focus on a task for a certain amount of time before it starts to wander. Take a break of 5 or 10 minutes between each activity or after an hour of work. This makes it easier to complete the task by returning to it.
During breaks, it's a good idea to have a cup of tea, take a short walk, or stretch
Step 5. Avoid doing multiple activities simultaneously
In a fast-paced society, doing multiple things at once has become the norm, as people need to complete multiple jobs in a short amount of time. The brain is very flexible, and when trained to function in this way, you can lose your ability to concentrate. Lack of focus creates distractions such as other people's daydreams or thoughts. Cut out the habit of doing everything at once and start focusing on one thing at a time.
- Step away from distractions and focus on one task at a time.
- When you notice your mind wandering, stop what you're doing, take 5 minutes off, and get back to the activity.
Step 6. Sleep well
When we're sleepy, it's easier to start rambling. Try to sleep between 7 and 9 hours a night. Having a set time to go to bed and get up can also be helpful.
- Try to clear your mind at night so you don't lie awake in bed fantasizing. Meditate before bedtime and avoid equipment with shiny screens until an hour before bedtime.
- In the morning, instead of lying in bed daydreaming, get up immediately and start your day.
Method 3 of 3: Turning Dreams into Reality
Step 1. Use costumes to identify your desires
Fantasizing is not necessarily an unproductive activity. In fact, dreams can indicate your desires. Of course, you may never become a professional football player or have a millionaire marriage, but realistic goals can be spotted.
For example, if you're always fantasizing about winning the lottery, you might be preoccupied with money. A good idea is to do more effective financial planning
Step 2. Set goals
The best way to reach a goal is to set realistic and achievable goals. Break each goal down into smaller, actionable steps and set a deadline for each. That way you can make a dream come true.
If you want to save more money, you need to set savings goals. Choose a realistic amount to save by a set date. It is also possible to have a goal of getting a better job or managing the monthly budget better
Step 3. Share your goals with others
It's not easy to get rid of fantasies. To stay in control, share your goals with a friend or family member. As others will know, you can have more gas to get better results and not drop the shuttlecock.
Ask a friend or family member to supervise you. That person can check how your evolution is going
Step 4. Go to the doctor or a psychologist for help
If you feel unable to avoid the fantasies, help from a professional may be needed. They can identify a problem that may be heightening your daydreams or help you understand the underlying causes of the fantasies.
- If the problem is very difficult to get rid of, or if you feel that it is taking over your life, you may have excessive daydreaming.
- A psychologist can teach you healthier mechanisms for dealing with trauma or abuse if fantasies are an outlet in this regard.