How to Be Less Perverted (with Pictures)

Table of contents:

How to Be Less Perverted (with Pictures)
How to Be Less Perverted (with Pictures)

Video: How to Be Less Perverted (with Pictures)

Video: How to Be Less Perverted (with Pictures)
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If you feel perverted, you may feel ashamed of certain sexual thoughts and attitudes due to a serious relationship (such as a marriage or monogamous relationship) or religious or spiritual beliefs. Regardless of the reason, sexual desires are likely to make you feel unable to conform to society's norms or the expectations you've created for yourself. However, remember that it is difficult to define what is "normal" and that sexuality encompasses a wide spectrum of thoughts, desires and practices.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Confronting Thoughts and Feelings

Be Less Perverted Step 1
Be Less Perverted Step 1

Step 1. Think about how sexual thoughts affect your life

Maybe you spend hours every day watching certain videos or fantasizing about sex in a way that prevents you from living your own life. To what extent does this perversion take you away from a productive or happy life? Do other people get hurt or hurt? How do these thoughts and behaviors cause problems?

  • Reflect on how these thoughts and attitudes affect your daily life and how your life would change if they disappeared. Would you have more time? Would you feel better about yourself? Would other people see you differently?
  • Remember that sexual thoughts are natural and not bad. If you have ever heard that you are a bad person or that you will be punished for thinking about sex, understand that we all have such thoughts and that they are completely natural. Especially during adolescence, everyone fantasizes about sex a lot, and this is a normal part of exploring sexuality.
Be Less Perverted Step 2
Be Less Perverted Step 2

Step 2. Understand better what healthy sexuality is

This concept can be difficult to understand. For example, some people like casual sex while others find it abhorrent, just as some people like to masturbate while others feel ashamed or refuse to do the same. Defining what is healthy sexuality means doing what seems healthy for everyone, in a way that enriches our lives, that is, an individual should feel sexually fulfilled and happy without any residual feelings of shame or self-hatred.

Keep in mind that human beings are sexual creatures by nature and that sex-related desires and feelings are perfectly normal

Be Less Perverted Step 3
Be Less Perverted Step 3

Step 3. Define your own healthy sexuality

While trying to cut down on perverted thoughts, it's important to decide which thoughts and attitudes you consider healthy. Don't try to eliminate all sexuality from your life, focus on creating a healthy sexual atmosphere for yourself, body and mind. Remember that trying to avoid all sexual thoughts or desires is not a realistic expectation, but we all have control over our behaviors.

  • Create a list of what you believe to be healthy sexuality. Focus on defining healthy thoughts and attitudes, how you become sexually involved with other people, and how you feel about yourself after such sexual involvement.
  • Think about the things that make you feel good and those that cause negative feelings. What's the difference between them?
Be Less Perverted Step 4
Be Less Perverted Step 4

Step 4. Confront the feeling of shame

It often comes from the belief that "This behavior makes me a bad person." If you think you're a pervert, you're likely to feel a little embarrassed, but it can lead to feelings of low self-esteem. Confront the shame and recognize that it does not play a positive role in your life.

  • Identify times when you feel embarrassed. Do you feel that way after masturbating or viewing porn? After thinking about sex? Look for the cause of the embarrassment and decide what needs to go: the attitude or the shame. Decide how you feel about this attitude, whether you would prefer to stop it, or whether you need to work to stop feeling ashamed about it.
  • Where does the shame come from? From a belief transmitted by family members? Of religious convictions? Understanding the source of the feeling will help you work with it.
  • When dealing with unwanted feelings of shame, repeat to yourself, "I am able to love and express my sexuality in a healthy and pleasurable way. Expressing my sexuality is not a cause for shame."
Be Less Perverted Step 5
Be Less Perverted Step 5

Step 5. Face the guilt

It can be a healthy emotion when recognized for the role it plays in shaping behavior. For example, when you feel remorse for an action, guilt may lead you to make a different decision the next time you are faced with a similar situation.

  • If you feel guilty about sexual thoughts or feelings, treat guilt as a guide and pay attention to it. Spend some time understanding the feeling and where it comes from, and think about how you can maintain healthy sexuality without feeling guilty.
  • Question yourself when you feel guilty. Is it related to acts or thoughts, your own sexuality or outside influences (such as religion or other beliefs)? Does she have a good reason to exist?
  • If you don't want to feel guilty about your sexuality, tell yourself, "I'm allowed to be a sexual creature and express my sexuality in a healthy, guilt-free way."
  • If you have hurt or hurt someone in a sexual way, facing the situation is absolutely necessary.
Be Less Perverted Step 6
Be Less Perverted Step 6

Step 6. Have a healthy relationship with your body

If you feel ashamed or embarrassed about your own body, learn to accept yourself as you are. Accept every detail of your body: skin color, hair texture, height and weight. You can become obsessed with other body types and adopt perverted thought patterns if you hate your own body. Start by practicing self-acceptance. The more we accept ourselves, our bodies and our sexuality, the healthier we become sexually.

  • Forgive your body if you feel ashamed of it for having stretch marks, sagging or scars, and learn to value all the body's functions, such as digesting food, eliminating toxins, and converting food into nutrients.
  • You don't have to celebrate every part of the body, but take the time to express gratitude for all the little things it does and all the abilities it provides.
  • The body tells a story: the skin tone, the freckles and the scars, every detail encompasses a story of ancestry and experience. Celebrate your family and their unique experiences on your living screen.

Part 2 of 3: Taking action

Be Less Perverted Step 7
Be Less Perverted Step 7

Step 1. Delete videos and images from the computer

Get rid of any material that might hinder your progress. By keeping your computer and cell phone free from temptation, you will foster an environment that will help you have fewer unpleasant thoughts and feelings about sex.

  • Use a parental control tool to prevent you from "accidentally" accessing any internet pornography site. You will have a few seconds to rethink this action and to redirect your sex drive elsewhere if you need to unlock this software.
  • If you have problems with the consumption of pornography, click here.
Be Less Perverted Step 8
Be Less Perverted Step 8

Step 2. Throw away all pornographic magazines or photographs

Also remember to include any posters on your bedroom wall and get rid of t-shirts, stickers or hats with prints that go against your idea of healthy sexuality. Create an environment that encourages you to keep chasing your goals and eliminates any thoughts or feelings that don't match your version of healthy sexuality.

Be Less Perverted Step 9
Be Less Perverted Step 9

Step 3. Pay attention to your mood

Sexual jokes can act as a subterfuge for someone to make sexual comments on the pretext of being funny, but in reality they are hostile and prejudiced. This kind of joke is often not funny, especially when directed at someone. They can be disrespectful and offensive, and making fun of someone's sexuality is never appropriate, especially when it's done in the form of gossip or with the intention of hurting someone. Do not do this.

If you see a joke that you find funny but that you know will hurt someone, keep it to yourself

Be Less Perverted Step 10
Be Less Perverted Step 10

Step 4. Distract yourself

You may need to distract yourself from your own thoughts or behavior. When you find yourself thinking or doing something you don't like, change your focus. Look the other way, bring up a different subject, or withdraw from the situation.

  • When you have trouble staying focused, take a break and go to the bathroom, take a walk, or start doing something completely different.
  • If you are looking at someone inappropriately, control yourself and distract yourself with something else.
  • Stop and say something different if you're about to tell an inappropriate joke.
Be Less Perverted Step 11
Be Less Perverted Step 11

Step 5. Keep interactions respectful

Remember to treat everyone with value and respect if you have perverted thoughts about someone. If you are interested in women, treat them all with respect, and the same goes for anyone interested in men. Respect each other's sexual limits and talk about them before engaging in any sexual act. Set boundaries and communicate your preferences and desires, also understanding the other person's preferences and desires.

Don't approach a person in a way that devalues them sexually

Be Less Perverted Step 12
Be Less Perverted Step 12

Step 6. Try not to reinforce ideas that others might make of you

If other people have called you a pervert, there are things you can do to not reinforce that kind of idea about yourself. Some behaviors can even be considered sexual harassment or intimidation, which could cause a number of problems. Avoid:

  • Making sexual gestures or jokes.
  • Talking about sex at inappropriate times, such as during class, while someone is telling a story, or in other situations where people might feel uncomfortable.
  • Sending text messages with sexual content or inappropriate images to other people.
  • Touching private parts in public.
  • Touching other people in inappropriate or undesirable ways.
  • Exposing private parts to other people.

Part 3 of 3: Making Personal Changes

Be Less Perverted Step 13
Be Less Perverted Step 13

Step 1. Deal with stress effectively

You may feel more vulnerable and fall back into bad habits if you are stressed, so find ways to relieve and manage everyday stress. Don't let it build up, find ways to reduce it daily. Engaging in physical activity, being social, and avoiding unnecessary stressors are all excellent ways to control the problem.

  • Join a running club, start practicing yoga or daily walking with your dog.
  • Call a loved one, host a game night at home, or plan a dinner with friends.
  • If you feel chronically stressed but cannot identify the source of the problem, create a journal and record everything that stresses you daily. Start by looking for patterns among the causes of your stress and then start addressing them one by one.
Be Less Perverted Step 14
Be Less Perverted Step 14

Step 2. Choose friendships carefully

Don't surround yourself with people who encourage you to think or act inappropriately. Maybe you need to get away from some friends or start new friendships from scratch. The people in your life should support you and encourage you to live in the way you find most beneficial to yourself. Having people who support us helps reduce stress.

If some people influence you negatively but are essential parts of your life, gently ask them to refrain from certain comments or behaviors, or not to discuss such matters with you

Be Less Perverted Step 15
Be Less Perverted Step 15

Step 3. Seek support from friends

They will be able to help you along this journey, and things will be easier with the support of your loved ones. If other friends have similar problems, create a group where everyone is accountable to one another. Send messages of support, get together for lunch, and encourage each other to stay on the right path.

You can also join a local or online support group, such as the Brazilian Association of Human Sexuality and Dependents on Love and Sex Anonymous

Be Less Perverted Step 16
Be Less Perverted Step 16

Step 4. See a therapist

If you feel unable to control unwanted thoughts, feelings and behaviors and believe that you will not be able to overcome the problem on your own, consult a mental health professional. It will help you cope with these feelings, find coping strategies, and work to lessen negative sexual thoughts. The therapist will be there to support you and help you live a fuller and happier life.

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