Making friends with someone takes time. You have to introduce yourself, get to know the person and build a relationship with time. There are those who find this process easy, while others have a lot of difficulty. This article has several useful tips for anyone looking to develop something lasting.
Part 1 of 3: Approaching someone
Step 1. Introduce yourself to the person you want to meet
This is the starting point of any friendship. Find opportunities to greet her and say her name without sounding forced.
- If possible, approach them at school or college, especially if you have a common friend with this person or both are in a group.
- If you're at a party, introduce yourself to have someone you can talk to.
- If you are in the same group to do a job, say your name and ask for the person's.
Step 2. Ask her questions
When possible, try to get to know a little more about this person to show your interest.
- "Do you have brothers or sisters? How many?"
- "What do you like to do when you're idle?"
- "What sports do you play?"
- "Likes to cook?"
- "What are your hobbies?"
- "Have you always lived here?"
- "What are your favorite artists/bands/songs?"
- "Do you like reading? What is your favorite work?"
Step 3. Answer the questions she asks you
When you have a series of questions for a person, they usually ask the same questions. Respond well to everything so that this individual also has the opportunity to get to know you.
- Friendship is a two-way street: both must know each other well to develop a close relationship.
- Don't talk too much or too little. When answering the questions, limit yourself to the same amount of detail that the person has given about themselves.
Step 4. Don't address controversial issues
In early interactions, it's best to avoid topics that are too personal.
- Have a light, lively conversation and talk about things you have in common and what you want to find out about each other.
- Change the conversation if it gets too personal: "I'm still not comfortable talking about this right now. Have you ever been to a concert?"
- End the conversation or change course if you start to discuss a hot topic: "I know everyone has their own opinions on the subject, but I think we should talk about something lighter."
Step 5. Take it easy when getting to know the person
Don't bombard her with uninterrupted questions, or she may feel interrogated.
- When you meet this person on various occasions (school, college, shopping, etc.), take the opportunity to get to know them a little better.
- This process can happen in a few weeks or over several months - it is not an instantaneous thing that ends in a few hours.
Step 6. When ready, ask the person if they want to exchange contact information
Give something like this to your new friend:
- Phone number for calls and/or messages
- Whatsapp Number
- Email address
- Profiles on social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram
Part 2 of 3: Building the Foundation of Friendship
Step 1. Know how to behave like a friend
To approach and develop a good relationship with someone, you have to know how to behave.
Reflect on your own personality and determine your strengths and weaknesses as a friend. Commit to eliminating the negatives and thus becoming a better person. For example, you may have a habit of forgetting to reply to messages you receive; start answering everything within two hours
Step 2. Be honest with your friend
After all, no one likes to discover that a person's true personality is completely different from what he or she exhibits.
- Make your peculiarities clear and maybe the person will do the same!
- Explore your sense of humor and tell funny jokes.
- Talk about your hobbies and interests, even if they sound "weird". Maybe your friend has the same tastes!
Step 3. Accept your friend as he is
Don't try to force him to change. Each person is unique and everyone wants to be accepted that way.
Step 4. Invite your friend to activities together
You can do several things to strengthen your friendship:
- Go to the cinema
- go to the amusement park
- Going shopping
- Invite a friend to dinner at home
- Invite a friend to some leisure activity at home
- Invite friend to play board games or play video games
- Participate in local sports teams such as football or basketball
Step 5. Remember to celebrate important dates for your friend
On his birthday, give him a card or even a gift. He'll also appreciate your recognition when he's earned something, like a place at a university.
- Show genuine interest and joy in your friend. If you're not really happy, he'll find out and the friendship will deteriorate.
- If you end up competing with him (for a place at the university, for example) and you can't, don't be jealous - this feeling is harmful and only damages the friendship.
Step 6. Make it clear that you are willing to support your friend whenever he or she needs it
After all, that's your job.
- Be present when these situations arise. For example, if he argues with a sibling or other acquaintance, help him overcome the problem.
- Be trustworthy. This is an important aspect of any true friendship. So if you say you'll always be there to help, keep your promise.
Step 7. Be completely open and frank with your friend
After all, no relationship survives secrets and lies.
- Whenever he asks for your opinion about something, give a polite and honest answer.
- Talk about your views in a friendly and kind way.
- Don't keep secrets from that friend, especially if they involve you.
Part 3 of 3: Closer Friendship
Step 1. Show the value you place on friendship
Combine the strategies listed below with each other to make your affection for the friend in question clear:
- Be trustworthy.
- Be honest.
- Be genuine.
- Support the friend.
- Include him in plans.
- Celebrate his achievements.
- Help him whenever necessary.
Step 2. If you already have plans or obligations when your friend asks you out, make them clear
Suggest another day when they can meet.
Suggesting another socializing opportunity will prove that you want to meet him and that you enjoy his interactions
Step 3. Resolve any conflicts that arise
As much alike as they are, friends always end up arguing and disagreeing about something - sooner or later. Resolve any situation that arises.
- Apologize when you're wrong. Take responsibility for your actions.
- Suggest solutions to problems rather than waiting for your friend to take action.
Step 4. See everything from your friend's perspective
As much as you are similar, you are two different people. So try to understand certain events or issues from their point of view.
- Try to understand why a problem makes you so angry. What happens?
- Don't ignore the situation just because you don't feel uncomfortable about it. Help your friend face it and create strategies to deal with the situation.
Step 5. Respect your friend's personal space
He may not want your involvement or assistance in all aspects of life. Respect that desire and give him the freedom he needs.
- Even if one of you moves, you can still preserve the friendship. Make frequent contact and show the friend that you respect their needs.
- Tell him that you are still there for him, even when he needs to be alone.
- Understand that you don't need to see each other every day and that each of you has your life, commitments and obligations.
Step 6. Trust your friend
Every good friendship involves trust - and, as stated earlier, friendship is a two-way street.
- Always be open and honest with your friend so that he has no reason to distrust you.
- Solve your problems with conversations and think of solutions that won't harm the relationship.
- Share your feelings and dreams with your friend to show that you trust him (and are therefore sharing something intimate).
- Forgive your friend's mistakes. Holding a grudge is bad for emotional health and can even end a friendship.