With today's technology, people can easily connect and hide their activities. Checking a partner's or partner's activities usually involves some form of supervision, whether it's observing the person's behavior or monitoring their activities online. Your partner can access the Internet from a computer or mobile device, which can make monitoring actions difficult. It's best to always talk to the person rather than spy on them, though. If you want information about students who might be cheating, read the How to Detect Plagiarism article.
Method 1 of 6: Observing Your Partner's Behavior
Step 1. Notice if the person is acting differently
An unfaithful partner may act differently in many ways, including being more physically distant, uninterested in having sex, or being more critical, hostile, aggressive, or completely absent. Pay attention to the person's online activities, which can also indicate an attempt to hide something. If it hides your browser every time you arrive, requires privacy when using your computer, spends a lot of time online after you go to sleep, or opens new email accounts, be wary.
Step 2. Confirm that she is not just doing something else
A person acting strangely or distantly may not necessarily be cheating on you. Maybe she's just preoccupied with a professional or family matter. Or perhaps she is involved in other harmful activities, such as selling drugs or gambling online. These are serious issues that can dramatically affect a relationship and that must be addressed with a support network and an expert professional.
Step 3. Keep a record of your partner's activities
Keep track of activities as much as you can, including what he or she does online, overtime at work, bank account withdrawals, phone calls, emails, and more. This will help you pay attention to details that may be important when identifying if your partner is hiding something.
Step 4. Prepare for what you might discover
Have a plan for what you will do if you find out you are being betrayed. Seeing this information can end a relationship-not just the relationship between you and the person, but between family members, children, and friends. A betrayal can also have financial impacts. Find out what you think about infidelity and what the limits are. What kind of physical involvement counts as a betrayal for you?
- Have someone to talk to. Choose a friend or family member to ask for help at this time. If possible, choose someone who cannot be seen as a romantic interest of yours, as your own relationships may be evaluated in the process.
- Seek a source of support among friends and family to overcome the situation. When there is a betrayal, it is common for friends and family to be devastated too. Which side should they choose? Think about who could be your source of support.
- Consult a lawyer who specializes in family crises or marriages. You will likely need legal advice if you are married on paper or share financial resources with your partner or partner.
- Consult a psychologist or therapist. If your suspicions are correct, you may need to make decisions that will completely alter your life. A betrayal can lead to trauma and a psychologist can help you in this case. Ask friends for referrals to find a psychologist or therapist who meets your needs. You may need to consult with some professionals before deciding.
Method 2 of 6: Monitoring a Partner's Online Activities
Step 1. Check browsing history
This will help you identify the websites the person is visiting. Each browser has its own history. If your partner or partner is hiding something, chances are the history has been deleted, making it difficult to track online activity.
Step 2. Check the person's email
If you know your partner's email password, check the messages they've been exchanging. If you don't have the password, check if it was saved in a browser. Be aware of electronic privacy violations before hacking into an email account, however.
Enable computer cookies. If the email password is not saved in your browser, cookies may be disabled. Go to your browser settings and enable cookies, which record information and passwords. The computer will then start storing your partner's information the next time he uses it
Step 3. Try to interact with your partner through a pseudonym
If you think your partner is frequenting chat rooms or online forums, join them too, but using a pseudonym. Chatting or flirting with your partner can reveal what he's been up to and whether he is in fact unfaithful.
Some people create fake Facebook accounts to spy on their partners, although you should be careful with this approach as it can do irreparable damage to your relationship and trust between you
Step 4. Install a keylogger on your partner's computer
These programs record everything that is typed on the keyboard, in addition to taking screenshots and recording clicks as well. So you'll find out the usernames and passwords he uses for email accounts and websites. These types of programs vary widely in quality. Some are available for free, such as Free Keylogger Pro, while others are paid such as All in One Keylogger, The Best Keylogger or Total Spy and can cost from 100 to 250 reais or more.
Step 5. Use a tracking program on your partner's computer or cell phone
There are several options available that vary in quality, cost and effectiveness for both computers and cell phones. These programs, such as WebWatcher, Stealth Genie or Spector Pro can log activities and their locations (in the case of a mobile phone). Many of these programs offer social media monitoring, email copying, chat histories and other features. Prices vary, but are around 270 to 300 reais.
Check the monitoring and privacy laws before engaging in this type of activity
Method 3 of 6: Verifying Your Partner's Activities on Mobile Devices
Step 1. Find out where the unknown numbers are from
If your partner has an unknown number in their cell phone call or message history, do a search to identify them. Do the same with unknown email addresses.
Step 2. Check the messages your partner has been sending
If you find suggestive messages with an unknown recipient, it could be a sign of betrayal. Examine the message history to determine how long this has been happening. It is possible, however, that your partner has a habit of deleting or archiving messages.
Step 3. Install a GPS tracking program on your partner's cell phone
There are many programs these days that can locate a device using GPS. This way, you'll be able to track the places your partner frequents, in addition to the current location if he has the device in hand. Compare the locations with what he's been reporting to you. If there are differences, it is likely that he is lying.
Step 4. Use a supervisory technology that activates a remote microphone on the phone
Some programs are able to enable the device's microphone remotely so that you can hear and record everything that is said. The cell phone will essentially broadcast all the conversations and sounds that are captured near it.
Step 5. See if your partner is using more than one phone number
Different SIM chips can store different information, like other contact lists, without having to change phones and, as a result, raise suspicion.
Step 6. Check your partner's browsing history
If he uses a smartphone, then there will likely be a browsing history. Note which sites are used frequently. However, he may have a habit of erasing this information, which can make your investigation difficult.
Method 4 of 6: Researching Unknown People Online
Step 1. Find out where unknown emails are coming from
If your partner has been receiving messages from someone you don't recognize, do a reverse lookup. It is also possible to do a reverse lookup for phone numbers.
Step 2. Research the names online
If you suspect that your partner is cheating on you with a specific person or if you have found a name, try looking for more information in online search engines. This is also helpful in finding out the person's interests, work history, family and financial situation.
Step 3. Pay for a professional search
Sometimes standard searches don't bring up much information, so you can pay to gather more information about the person. Prices are generally affordable, ranging from 45 to 120 reais or more. Some of these services have a better reputation compared to others, so research the service in question before hiring it.
Method 5 of 6: Hiring a Private Investigator
Step 1. Determine if you need to hire a private detective
In some cases, it's best to leave the investigation to a professional. It can be helpful to hire someone to track your partner if you are a naturally jealous, emotionally insecure, paranoid, or anticipatory person with a tendency to overreact in certain situations.
Step 2. Hire a professional service to observe your partner online and in person
Look for an investigative professional with good references and who acts in accordance with the law. If you need to file a lawsuit based on the evidence you've gathered through the investigator, you need to make sure it's been gathered in a lawful manner. This can be especially important if evidence has been collected through online monitoring. Electronic privacy laws can be confusing, and a professional investigator usually has more experience and understanding of the subject. He will also be able to provide unbiased remarks, which can help you make a rational decision on the issue.
Step 3. Be willing to pay
Private investigators are not cheap and can charge up to 600 reais an hour or more. Well specify the amount of time he should devote to your case. Also take into account how much you are willing to pay for all of this. Is it necessary to keep the investigation a secret? Hiding this from your partner can be difficult if you have a joint bank account, for example.
Step 4. Reduce costs and do the research yourself
Gather information about your partner's online activities by checking your browsing history or email account, for example. Give the investigator some background information so he doesn't spend so much time figuring out a few things before he gets to the root of the problem.
Method 6 of 6: Confronting Your Partner
Step 1. Confront your partner if you discover a betrayal
One of the most direct ways to discover a betrayal is to ask the person directly. Not everyone is honest and it is possible that he will continue to lie. Spying on him online can contribute to feelings of hostility between the two of you, as well as eliminate any traces of trust that may remain.
Step 2. Choose the best time to chat
Try to pick a time when both are available and willing to talk. You might want to try to catch your partner in the act, but that might not be the most productive approach.
Step 3. Don't be aggressive or accusatory in your questions
Be serious and calm throughout the conversation to seek honest answers, rather than demanding that your partner say what you've been doing or who you've been with.
Step 4. Suggest to your partner that you visit a couples therapist
Ask your trusted friends for references or do a search on the Sociedade Brasileira de Psicologia page. Not all couples therapists will be right for you, and you may need to visit a few to find the best one. Be patient with your partner during the process, especially if he admits to cheating on you. If there is a commitment on both sides to make the relationship work, then both parties will need to be willing and willing to forgive.
- Accessing and reading someone's email may be illegal depending on your intentions. Research what the law says about electronic monitoring and tapping of conversations before engaging in this type of activity. Some jurisdictions may be stricter than others regarding privacy in a marital relationship and protections against espionage.
- By spying on a partner or spouse, you are putting trust between you and you at risk, especially if you don't find anything wrong.
- Be careful when downloading spy programs on your computer or your partner's computer. Many contain viruses and can damage the device's hard drive.