Sometimes a relationship can become toxic; in others, one partner (or both) may stop fueling the flame of romance; other relationships simply end because one person realizes that he or she is not compatible with the other. Regardless of the reason, the initiative to end a relationship can create an awkward situation and, although the temptation to misbehave so that the other person decides to break up and do the dirty work for you, the best course of action it's still being honest about your feelings so things can end as amicably as possible.
Method 1 of 3: Moving away from your partner
Step 1. Avoid or ignore the other person
Don't answer phone calls or answer text messages, and ignore any invitations to go out - such physical detachment will indicate that something isn't right in the relationship.
Keep in mind that this type of behavior can also make the other person angry and cause even more drama in the relationship, so you may start getting angry messages and "surprise" visits that don't always go over well
Step 2. Blame the other for dating problems
Put all the blame for your actions on your partner, and he may be so hurt that he will consider putting an end to the relationship.
Keep in mind that this method can lead to an irreversible separation, and your partner is likely to look down on you from then on
Step 3. Cheat on your boyfriend or flirt with other people to make him jealous
This is another distancing tactic that can hurt and upset the other too much, causing the relationship to end.
- Remember that flirting and cheating are techniques that involve other people in the situation, so things can get even more complicated because you'll have to deal with two or more "partners" at the same time instead of just one.
- This is also a very drastic and destructive way to get someone to dump you.
Method 2 of 3: Talking About It
Step 1. Reflect on all the benefits of talking about wanting to break up with your partner
While the idea of simply avoiding the other person or purposely hurting them may seem tempting, a mature conversation about your feelings is the best way to avoid hurt feelings and end things civilly.
Instead of avoiding the other person, recognize that they have every right to know that you are unhappy in the relationship
Step 2. Sit down with your partner to talk about these feelings in person
The healthiest way to get someone to break up with you is to talk directly about your dissatisfaction with dating, face to face - that way you can both end the relationship maturely and respectfully and without anyone causing unnecessary pain.
Step 3. Be honest and direct, but take the other person's feelings into account
Be prepared for him to want to argue, swear he can change, or argue that you're wrong - try to put yourself in his shoes and show empathy if he shows hurt or anger.
- Stay calm and repeat a phrase that helps you feel comfortable, such as "This dating isn't working for me" or "I don't want to be in this relationship anymore."
- Avoid sentences that sound like generic excuses, such as "It's not you, it's me" or "We weren't meant to be the problem."
Step 4. Be direct in stating the reason for the separation
Explain why you don't want to date anymore by focusing on your feelings rather than making a list of each other's faults and problems.
Your partner may become angry or criticize you at this part of the conversation, so be prepared and strive to remain calm
Step 5. Take his feelings into account, but be firm when defending your decision
No matter how many tears or emotions arise during the conversation - sticking to the decision to end the relationship is very important, so don't back down.
In addition, it is also important to give the other person space and time to be able to accept the breakup, so keep your distance and eliminate contact with them - "cutting off" is often the best way to end a relationship
Step 6. Seek help if the relationship is abusive or violent
In this case, breaking up is not as simple as sitting down and having an adult conversation, as informing an abusive partner of your desire to break up is dangerous and can increase the risk of violence against you or others.
- You will need time to plan for the separation, and you may need to enlist the help of a trusted family member or friend.
- Look for helplines for victims of domestic violence in your city and ask for advice on how to safely leave the relationship.
Method 3 of 3: Ending the relationship for good
Step 1. Avoid staying with the person after the breakup
This kind of attitude will likely only provoke feelings of confusion in everyone involved, ruining any benefit that the separation brings.
Step 2. Wait a long time before getting back together with your ex-boyfriend
Some people prefer to cut off all sorts of contact with their old partner when they need to get over a breakup, but over time you may feel comfortable enough to get back in touch with your ex.
Do this only after you've spent a considerable amount of time away from each other, and when you're sure you're past the end of the relationship, even if you were the person responsible for the breakup
Step 3. Seek legal means if the person starts stalking or harassing you
Violence suffered during an abusive relationship may persist even after termination, or take the form of harassment or harassment.
- Avoid keeping in contact with the person and tell them once and clearly, via email or text message, that you no longer want to talk to them and that any attempt to contact them will be interpreted as harassment.
- Keep a record of all unwanted contact attempts, but don't react to any of them. Call the police if he insists too often or makes direct threats.
- While a person can take many immature actions to get someone to end a relationship with them (such as ignoring the other, cheating on them, hurting them, or treating them meanly), the most direct way to end a relationship is to talk. about your feelings.
- Don't be unfaithful. Regardless of the situation, don't cheat on your partner - just be direct and break up if you want to be with someone else.
- Never cheat - this is a horrible, childish attitude. Instead, have a sincere dialogue with your partner.