At one time or another, everyone has suffered a romantic rejection: after a breakup, after trying to invest in someone, etc. This type of situation generates emotional symptoms, such as anxiety and depression, and even physical ones, such as insomnia and loss of appetite. If it's happening to you, don't worry! You can solve the problem in several different ways, such as those listed in this article.
Method 1 of 3: Dealing with Common Physical Symptoms
Step 1. Go to bed at a fixed time every night
Many people who are heartbroken or have other love issues have difficulty falling asleep. If this happens to you, do the following to rest better:
- Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, including weekends.
- Turn off your TV, computer, cell phone, and all other screens at least half an hour before bedtime.
- Do not take anything with caffeine in the afternoon or evening.
- Close the curtain, turn off the light, and just use the bedroom to rest and have sex. No working, eating or reading in bed!
Step 2. Eat in smaller portions and more often until your appetite regains
Losing your appetite and losing weight are two common symptoms among people who are heartbroken. In that case, eat your favorite foods and decrease the portion sizes, but increase the frequency. As a bonus, you'll have more energy throughout the day.
See a doctor if you run out of appetite and notice that you are losing too much weight. Perhaps the case is more serious and needs professional follow-up
Step 3. Have a cup of ginger tea when you are sick
Some people even get nauseous and even throw up when they are hurt for love reasons! Fresh ginger has anti-emetic properties and is a potent natural ally in these cases as it relieves symptoms. Buy it at any supermarket and prepare a cup of tea when you feel sick.
- Chop or mash a 2.5 cm piece of ginger, place it in a cup and add 240 ml of water. Then let it infuse for ten minutes and take it slowly after that time.
- You also have the option of chewing a piece of peeled ginger if you're running out of time!
Step 4. Do at least 30 minutes of exercise on weekdays to release accumulated energy
Doing aerobic exercise is a shot and a fall to reduce accumulated stress and energy, especially since these symptoms are common among heartbroken people. You just need to think of something you enjoy doing!
- Some suggestions: go for a walk close to home, take a bike ride on the nearest bike path, take an aerobics class or take a dip in the pool.
- You can break this workout into smaller sessions if you don't have 30 minutes in a row: do three ten-minute workouts, two 15-minute workouts, or something like that.
Step 5. See a doctor if you feel tightness in your chest
Some people get the feeling of tightness in their chest when they get hurt. It can be caused by panic or a more serious health problem. Anyway, it's important to see a doctor.
Go to the emergency room right away if you feel tightness in your chest or pain in that area and arms that spreads to your neck, back, or jaw. All of these items could be symptoms of a heart attack.
Method 2 of 3: Dealing With Emotional Symptoms
Step 1. Vent what you are feeling with a friend or family member
Talking to a trusted person about your feelings is one of the coolest ways you can discharge those negative emotions. Call, text or find a friend or family member and explain what's going on.
For example: call a friend or family member and say "I'm having a hard time getting over Regina's outside. I wanted to vent to someone. Do you have time to meet me later?"
Step 2. Allow 15 minutes or more each day to relax and relieve anxiety
Stress and anxiety are also symptoms of disappointment in love and therefore it is very important to think about ways to deal with them. You can even resort to relaxation techniques that bring you calmer. For example:
- Progressive muscle relaxation.
- Deep breathing exercises.
Step 3. Don't try to drown your hurts with alcohol or drugs
Alcoholic beverages and drugs have a negative effect on mood. Avoid these substances if you are already hurting or experiencing drastic emotional changes such as depression and anxiety. Consult a physician or psychologist if you need suggestions for tools and resources to alleviate the problem.
Step 4. Use the pomodoro technique if you are having trouble concentrating
This difficulty is another common symptom among people who suffer love disappointments. With the pomodoro technique, you'll divide your tasks into four 25-minute periods interspersed with five-minute breaks each time. Start taking longer breaks of 20 minutes from the fifth rep. Over time, this increases your focus and your productivity.
- Mark each duty cycle and interval on the timer on your wristwatch or cell phone.
- Make an "X" on a sheet of paper every time you finish a period of activity, and don't stop until you've completed the entire exercise.
Step 5. Write about what you feel in a journal
Writing is also a way to release negative feelings from the mind and heart. Tell the good and bad emotions you are feeling and try to explain why you feel them. Do the exercise for ten minutes or more a day in this process of getting over what happened.
For example, if you feel anxious about heartbreak, explain in your journal what you're feeling and when it all started, as well as situations where things seem to be getting a little better
You can also download a diary app and write on your mobile every day.
Step 6. See a psychiatrist if you think you are depressed
Serious cases of disappointment or love rejection can turn into depression, marked by feelings of hopelessness, emotional overload and irritability. You may even lose interest in everyday activities. If this happens, see a psychiatrist and ask about taking an antidepressant. He will recommend some medication if he thinks he should.
- Talk to a psychiatrist if you are already taking any medication that might interfere with the antidepressant effect.
- Discuss all possible side effects with your psychiatrist before taking the antidepressant.
Method 3 of 3: Overcoming the situation for good
Step 1. Ask the person out (if still possible)
What's stopping you from calling your crush out if you're both single? Just be simple and casual! Say you are interested and explain that you would like to get to know the person better.
- Say something like "I enjoy your company a lot. Will you go out with me anytime?"
- On the other hand, bring up some random topic with the person in case you don't already know them well. For example: say "I want to try a new drink, but I don't know which one. What do you recommend?" if you always see her in a bar or a club.
Step 2. Try to get to know other people to overcome the disappointment
You can invest your time in someone else if your crush is not available. And don't worry if some of your advances are also rejected: the important thing is to get over what happened. Keep hanging out with friends and meeting new people. Who knows what's not in store in your future?
- For example: you can start a conversation with a classmate or workmate and then make the invitation or accept the help of your friend who is always trying to play Cupid!
- It's a different story if you're disappointed in a toxic relationship. In that case, the best alternative is to get over that person altogether. She probably won't change, which ends up leading to a vicious circle where everyone gets hurt.
Step 3. Pay more attention to the person's faults and face them realistically
You can focus on all the bad things the person has instead of the good things to get over the passion for good. Make a list of these defects and refer to it whenever you have the slightest doubt.
For example, maybe you don't like a person's habit, like biting your nails, or you're lazy about their aggressive attitude in arguments
Step 4. Try to understand once and for all why the relationship didn't work out
It's hard to understand why certain relationships don't move forward, but rationalizing this story ends up helping to overcome the trauma. Think about the reasons why you and the person weren't ideal for each other whenever you start to have new doubts.
- For example, maybe you and the person have very different political views and were always fighting when you were together.
- It could also be that the person was not available (because they already have a relationship), which would only bring more confusion to everyone's lives.
Step 5. Learn to be more grateful to feel more and more positive emotions
You can be happier overall if you start to show gratitude in your everyday life. Hopefully, this will even combat your negative feelings towards the person! Make a list of the good things in your life, say thanks for everything you have or even send a simple "Thank you" message or note to your acquaintances.
Learn to show gratitude for everything from the little things to the most significant. For example, be grateful that you have a nice cup of coffee to drink every morning, that you have a good job, and that you have good friends
Step 6. Spend more time with those who are important in your life
Spending a lot of time with friends and family not only helps to distract the mind and heart, but also further strengthens the bonds of affection. In time, you won't even remember the person anymore! Go out with the group whenever you can, have lunch at your parents' house, schedule more relaxed activities with them, and so on.
Tip: Spend your time with nice people and avoid people who only make you stressed and anxious.
Step 7. Give a direction to whatever brings the person back to your mind
If your house is full of objects that remind you of the person, maybe it's time to pass them all on or at least store them elsewhere. If your "termination" is final, you can even sell or donate these things to never have any contact again.
- Leave at most one or two objects that resemble the person in your home, but keep them anyway.
- This is also true for messages, photos and other internet files.
Step 8. set goals for your life.
It will be much easier to overcome all that passion and disappointment with the person if you set goals for your life. Think of something you want to achieve in the future (near or far). Anything goes: finishing college, training to participate in a marathon, learning a new language, etc. Identify ways to put this goal into practice and take it one step at a time, but never stop.
- In the marathon example, you can start running longer and longer distances.
- In the college example, you may have to start a course! Even so, don't give up.
- See a mental health professional right away if you have any thoughts of suicide or desire to hurt another person. Don't ruin your life because of this disappointment in love: get help! This happens to a lot of people, so it's not hard to find someone who can be supportive.
- This kind of love insecurity can have serious long-term consequences. Research indicates that those who go through it are more susceptible to cardiovascular problems.