If you suspect your boyfriend is cheating on you, the relationship is probably in danger. But, of course, don't face him without having any hard evidence. Here are some things you can do to find out the truth.
Method 1 of 3: Analyzing Behavior Change
Step 1. Did the guy start worrying more than usual about his physical appearance?
Are you working out more, dressing better, doing more hair care, or wearing a new cologne? While these are healthy choices, consider whether he's trying to look better for someone else.
Step 2. Have sleep habits or daily commitments started to change?
If the guy usually sleeps at 9 pm and suddenly starts going out at night, open his eye.
If he had a routine of working out in the morning and going home after work, but now he's waking up late or working a lot of overtime, he's probably spending time with someone else
Step 3. Is he more distant or distracted?
If the guy was thoughtful and loved to have long conversations with you about it, but has suddenly started to show disinterest, it could be a sign that he's paying attention to something else.
- The partner may also lose interest in household activities such as spending time with the children, fixing the faucet or cleaning the yard, and so on.
- He may also start spending more time on his cell phone or computer. If this comes with an air of mystery, be alert.
Step 4. Analyze your sex life
Did the amount decrease or increase very strangely? Did he start to have different tastes?
- You might wonder how he developed a certain preference or learned a certain move… He may be trying out new things with someone else.
- The guy may also start refusing your attempts at intimacy with excuses like "I'm tired" or "Maybe tomorrow."
Step 5. Does he get angry or defensive more often?
Are you fighting more? Has he started arguing about anything, however small? You asked how that date with friends was, and he got defensive?
If he starts to get mad at you, it could be the result of guilt he feels about cheating or fear of being found out
Step 6. How does he act after a fight?
Go away and then come back apologizing? Or do you not ask for forgiveness or show remorse for the things you said? If he used to forget quickly but has now begun to hold a grudge, it could be a sign of betrayal.
It's important to remember that none of this is your fault. These behavior changes are the result of his anxieties and fears
Step 7. Note any suspicious changes in his behavior
In this way, you will be able to compile the evidence and determine dates, excuses given, etc.
An unfaithful partner will question your memory or deny the charges, so recording all suspicious events is essential
Step 8. Learn to detect lies.
Most people are very bad liars, so if you use the right technique, you can get the guy to confess.
If he discovers your suspicions, he'll try even harder to keep the secret. In that case, be more attentive
Step 9. It is possible that the reason for the changes is not betrayal
The guy may be experiencing problems such as depression, grief, severe anxiety, etc. Talk to him first, rather than taking more drastic measures.
Method 2 of 3: Snooping
Step 1. Pay attention to whether the guy is making long calls at odd hours or getting messages from other girls
Does he need privacy whenever he talks to someone? Turn off whenever you arrive? Do you chat whenever you ask who is on the other end of the line?
- If you can get his phone bill, make sure you know all the numbers and note the duration and times of the calls.
- It is also possible to look at text messages and listen to voice messages, but this increases the chances of being discovered. A tip is to pick up the phone when he is taking a shower. If he left the house and left the device on the charger, go ahead.
- If the guy is forgotten, take the device and let him think you lost it.
Step 2. Has he changed his computer password or moved the device to a more private room?
Is he defensive or distant when you use his computer or ask him what he's doing?
Try to access the computer when he's gone and look for secret folders with pictures of another girl
Step 3. Check the guy's accounts on social media like Facebook, Instagram etc
Many unfaithful boyfriends use the internet to act, especially if they are afraid of being discovered through their cell phone.
- Visit your browser history to see if the guy has any profiles on dating sites.
- Many unfaithful boyfriends create fake Facebook profiles to exchange messages with their lovers. See if he has bookmarked or visited a page many times.
- There are websites that post stories of unfaithful men so you can be aware of your partner's behavioral changes.
Step 4. Look for pictures, gifts or love notes in his apartment
If they live together, look on his side of the bed. Where would he hide something he didn't want you to see?
- Be careful not to misinterpret something that has sentimental rather than romantic value. Just because he has a photo of his ex-girlfriend doesn't mean he's cheating.
- Get hard evidence before confronting him.
Method 3 of 3: Monitoring Activities
Step 1. Place a hidden camera in his room or car
You can buy this device in popular stores or even on the internet. Put the camera where he spends a lot of time, especially when he's using his computer or talking on the phone.
Download a mobile app to record any strange sounds from a room where the device is left, including sex sounds or mysterious calls
Step 2. Download spy software to his computer
There are many options out there and they all work in the background without the person knowing.
These programs record information such as passwords or emails typed, pages visited or even a video of the screen. However, many of them can be illegal. Be alert. If the guy works in computing, forget about this alternative
Step 3. Put a GPS in his car or use some app to track the guy's cell phone
That way you can catch him in the act!
Step 4. Create a fake Facebook profile and add the guy
Start flirting with him and see the answers. If he starts sending you intimate photos or asking you to the motel… Well, that's not a good sign.
Step 5. Give him opportunities to cheat on you
While this option is more elaborate and requires some planning, it's a way to catch the guy in the act. Make up an excuse (salon, lunch with a friend, etc) and see if he takes advantage of your absence to meet someone else.
This alternative is the riskiest of all, as it requires you to convincingly lie
Step 6. Hire a private detective to discover the infidelity
Look for a professional who is an expert in this type of subject
If you're just suspicious, maybe it's better to confront him. That way you don't have to do anything behind his back. Have a mature conversation about trust and loyalty
- Don't follow the guy every day and don't go through his stuff too often, you're sure to get caught. If he's not cheating, it will backfire.
- Don't get obsessed with trying to find evidence, as most betrayals are accidentally exposed.