Animating a woman can be a difficult and exhausting process. However, with the right technique, the right words and actions, you can get her out of a bad time and put a smile on her face!
Method 1 of 3: Assessing the Situation
Step 1. First, try to find out what is wrong
If you can, try to find out why she's upset before you say anything. Quickly assess the situation. What happened recently that maybe upset you? Put yourself in her shoes: something that would upset you could probably upset her too. If you can understand why she's unhappy, you'll have a much better idea of what to say and what not to say to cheer her up.
Step 2. Ask her what's wrong
Even if you really know what's wrong, you should still ask her. This way, you avoid problems if you have misunderstood the situation. By asking, you will also have the opportunity to talk about her problems.
Be aware that she may say that there is nothing wrong or that she is tired or that this is less of a problem than it appears to be. If the person does, remind them that it's okay to be upset and that you're there to talk if they want to
Step 3. Ask what you can do to help
If she tells you what's wrong or you already know what's going on, ask what you can do to help her. However, it is important that you are really willing to help her. Nobody likes support without a cause.
Method 2 of 3: Cheering the Woman
Step 1. Let her speak
Letting her talk might be the best way to make her feel better. Just like anyone else, women are often upset because they feel like no one listens to them. They feel ignored, despised and voiceless. Listen to what she has to say. That might be enough to make her feel better;
Step 2. Give her a hug
The type of hug will depend on the situation and the type of relationship you have. If you're not too close or if she's not too upset, a side hug should suffice and show that you're supportive. If you guys are in a closer relationship or if she's really hurting, you might want to consider a big hug (the kind she might cry on your shoulder, as maybe she needs it too much).
Step 3. Tell her how much you care
She will feel much better if she knows she can count on your unconditional support, whether as a friend, boyfriend, or husband. It's easy to feel lonely when we're in trouble. Showing her that she's not alone and that there are people who care about her will cheer her up.
Step 4. Make her laugh
Laughter is, as they say, the best medicine. By laughing, we forget about our problems and are able to feel happy again (if only for a little while). Make her laugh to cheer her up, but be careful to avoid jokes or anything that might be offensive as they can make things worse.
- Sing her a song. Try to be a little silly. Singing a song is a great way to do this. Don't worry about singing poorly, as the goal is to make her laugh (and singing poorly will even help!). Start by singing Evidence as dramatically as you can, or try staging a scene from the Phantom of the Opera.
- Tell a funny story. Tell her that really embarrassing story you have from your high school days. You know what we mean: the one that makes you want to die, but makes everyone laugh. Or tell her about that time you found your college buddy drunk and sleeping, sitting on the toilet.
- Gather a Youtube playlist of funny videos. They can be kittens riding turtles while Low Rider plays in the background, pranks between parents and children or clips from the stand up of Whindersson Nunes. A selection from Youtube can make her forget her problems and get more excited.
Step 5. Make her smile
You'll want to do things that make you feel good too, not just be funny. Do something nice for her, something that shows you care and brings a smile to her face. Try to get that perfect mix between the sweet and the silly.
- Leave small notes everywhere. Tell her how beautiful she is. Remind her of funny stories. Leave humorous critiques of random objects. You can even leave notes with trivia.
- Draw a silly picture. The worse your drawing skills are, the better. Use humorous labels if it's too hard to tell what the image is. You can be cute and draw a picture of the two of you, or you can be silly and draw a cat in a hat having tea with a fish.
- Make a CD for her. You can compile songs that remind her of her, uplifting songs, or whatever sound she likes.
Step 6. Make her forget about her problems
You can also find many other ways to make her forget about her problems. Going out and doing different things really are the best ways to overcome the challenges and stressful situations in our lives.
- Get out. You can go out to eat or you can decide to take a walk. Getting her out of her usual environment is vital to making her forget about her problems. The more concentration needed for the activity, the better.
- Talk about things you guys did together. You can talk about the time you had to carry that drunk friend across town after that college party. Or that time in high school where she had to help him hide a fiasco. Or the time the dishwasher exploded at work. Talking about memories like these can take a girl's mind off her problems, directing her thoughts elsewhere…
- Play games or watch movies. Board and card games are really making a comeback (try Cards Against Humanity!), and movies are a time-honored way to deal with bad emotions (who doesn't feel better after watching Independence Day?).
Method 3 of 3: Knowing what to avoid
Step 1. Don't try to get into those "who has the worst problems" discussions
It never makes people feel better. It's just a way to make everything revolve around you.
Step 2. Don't change the subject too quickly
Allow time for her to share all her feelings. If you're not willing to take the time to make her feel better, then you better not start getting involved.
Step 3. Don't ignore it completely
You don't want her to feel like you're ignoring or downplaying her problems. It's one thing for her not to want to talk about what she's feeling; another is for you to play dumb.
Step 4. Don't hit on her
This is not an opportunity for you to take advantage of her weakness. If you want her to like you more, be supportive and a good friend. She will remember this later.
Step 5. Don't tell her to cheer up
Saying "cheer up a little" will only make things worse. It is well-worn, clichéd, unnecessary and ineffective advice.
- Give her a big hug to make her feel better. Sometimes that's all she needs.
- Be careful. Don't do or say something stupid to put her down again! Use your common sense.
- Know who she really is. Know how she thinks, what makes her very angry and what makes her happy. Know how to talk to her without touching on bad topics. Know that she trusts you and keep that in mind when she refuses to say something.
- Be patient. This process can take hours, but you have to stay steadfast to the end! Getting frustrated after a long period of time will only make things worse. Be calm and understanding. Never raise your voice! Getting mad at her isn't going to help her get better in any way.
- Overall, show that you care. Show her that you want to be the best partner you can be. Forget about yourself and dedicate yourself to it. Not only will the short-term effects of your kindness be great (her feeling better, her respect and gratitude), but the long-term effects (greater sense of connection, strengthened relationship, proof to her that you are the most amazing guy of all) will undoubtedly be beneficial to both of you. So get to work, guys! Cheer up that woman and reap the benefits!
- Be selfless. Forget yourself and your needs! This really works for all times when you are trying to establish a strong and lasting relationship, but especially in these situations! She is more important than you. You must keep that mindset. If she is discouraged, become her servant - do what she asks, as long as it makes her happy. Give her room if the girl asks. She may reject help at first, only to open up later. If you're confident in the strength of your relationship and the level of mutual respect between you, she won't ask for anything dangerous or illegal. So don't put yourself first! You'll be fine and she'll feel better.