Have you ever found yourself in a relationship where you're not sure how the person feels about you? One of the things you need to know about successful relationships is that they always need to move forward. Gaining and keeping your partner's love takes a lot of work, but it's possible if you put in the effort and are thoughtful enough.
Part 1 of 2: Communicating Better
Step 1. Never stop chatting
Psychologists say effective communication is one of the keys to successful relationships. Keep communicating and make an effort to talk a lot. That doesn't mean you can never take a break and enjoy a moment of silence, obviously.
- If you know how to communicate and talk about the right things with your girlfriend, your relationship will blossom and have more romance. Your girlfriend will be even more in love.
- There will be times when you feel like you have nothing more to say, but if you want to keep up the chemistry, there are plenty of ways to keep the channels of communication open besides a "hand me the salt, please."
Step 2. Talk about the future
Talk about your life, the things you want to do, your goals for the future and your aspirations. Do you want to go to college? What kind of job do you want to have? These are good conversationalists.
Women generally like forward-thinking men who strive to achieve it
Step 3. Talk about her
Discuss your girlfriend's interests, friends and family. Ask about the people in her life and have long conversations about what she likes to do. What are her hobbies? What does she like and dislike?
- Talk about everyday things that interest you, whether it's shopping, cooking, listening to music or blogging. Your girlfriend will feel special if you're willing to stop and listen to what she has to say. Many women find it irritating when a man talks only about himself.
- Talking about these interests will help her see that you are genuinely interested in knowing everything about her life. It also shows that you intend to be a part of her life for a while.
- Be sincere. Don't pretend you're interested in something, as this could end up screwing things up and hurting your girlfriend.
- You may come to realize that you have the same hobbies and will be able to connect even more. When you meet her friends or family, you'll have plenty of subjects you can impress them with!
Step 4. Play a question and answer game
Social psychology researchers have found that asking questions almost always makes two people feel better about each other and want to spend more time together.
- The five most important questions are: 1) Having the opportunity to choose anyone in the world you would like to go out to dinner with? 2) Would you like to be famous? 3) Before making a call, do you rehearse what you are going to say? Why? 4) What would a perfect day be like for you? 5) When was the last time you sang to yourself or someone else?
- You should take turns answering each question, and do it in the same order…
Step 5. Talk about her beliefs
We all have individual views on life, but we don't usually share them. By inviting her to open up about important issues about life, you will understand more about her essence and value system.
- Ask if she goes to church or how she was raised and if she plans to keep the family's beliefs and traditions.
- Talking about serious matters will show that you are committed and that you can also be serious and playful at the same time.
Step 6. Talk about childhood and past
It's always fun to talk and hear about childhood memories, especially if there's something embarrassing or funny. Talk about your first love or something funny you made. Then make her tell all the stories she wants.
- The two of you will benefit from learning more about each other's history. You will smile and get a better idea of how the person became who they are today.
- Talking about even painful or embarrassing memories will also show that you trust her enough to tell the least interesting stories as well as the funniest ones. Hopefully, she will also show confidence and share her past experiences.
Step 7. Praise and show some romance
Praise your girlfriend's dress or say thank you for something special she has done for you.
- Genuine compliments can bring more romance and more romantic conversations; they show that you think she is special and that you are lucky to be with her.
- Don't just praise the looks. Personality is what you really love, so show how funny and smart it is.
Step 8. Talk about world events
Show that you are well informed and involved. The girl will have respect for your interest in the world around you.
You will also learn a lot about each other's political views. You can get an idea of the compatibility between you
Step 9. Talk about your day
Generally, women end up talking more about their day while men just listen. But men can count a little too! Be open and tell the girl all about the little things you've done that day, whether at school, at work or at home. This will keep you involved in each other's daily lives, which is not only really cool, it's also extremely important. It's the everyday that keeps them connected; that's why long-distance relationships are so complicated.
Step 10. Talk about your fears
Women love guys who know how to open up and are honest about their fears. Tell her about the big things that scare you (like saying “I love you” or getting married one day) and the little everyday things (like spiders, heights, or cooking your own food!)
By talking about your own fears, you will make your girlfriend feel closer because you are revealing your vulnerable side. Talk about what bothers or upsets you. She will be interested and will likely support you
Step 11. Be honest
Tell the girl how you feel, no matter how good or bad. You will do wonders if you tell her what you are thinking and feeling and listen to her with an open mind.
Part 2 of 2: Showing the Feelings
Step 1. Do activities together
Spending time together is the best way to fall in love. Have dates and do things you both enjoy. Just having fun will help your girlfriend realize how happy she is with you.
Step 2. Plan for the future
Show that you see a future with her. Planning ahead is an indicator of commitment and is also a healthy ingredient for a relationship that is just beginning.
- Start forming “we” sentences (eg “we” should buy your bedroom furniture. “We” should go see that movie you want to see next weekend, etc.).
- For example, if you're with someone who loves art, make plans to go to a museum. If the girl likes a sport, suggest watching a game together.
- Start planning holidays and special dates. This is always a fun time in relationships. Decide when you'll see your girlfriend's family and when you'll stay with yours on important holidays like Christmas. She will love to see that you are planning ahead and showing that she and her family are a priority for you, especially on big dates like the end of the year.
- By talking about the future, or even the near future, you will help her imagine herself with you in those moments.
Step 3. Show respect and admiration
If the girl asks you not to use a specific word or to call her father "Sir", agree and grant the request. This doesn't mean you're giving in to her demands, but rather respecting your girlfriend's wishes.
- Respect her individuality. A woman who feels her boyfriend allows her to make her own decisions is more likely to stay in a relationship than a woman who feels she is being manipulated all the time. Don't compare her to other women. Accept that she has her own personality.
- Don't intimidate her or force her to do things she doesn't want. Of course, this ends up in an unhealthy relationship.
Step 4. Become intimate
This does not necessarily mean having sexual activities, but rather creating closeness and sexual chemistry. Physical and emotional intimacy is an important component of healthy, loving relationships.
Stay physically connected. Walk hand in hand or put your arm around your girlfriend when you're out walking. Kiss her, show with your actions how you want to be physically close and how much you are attracted to her
Step 5. Introduce her to your friends
That means you take her seriously and you want the girl to be a part of your life, not just an accessory.
Step 6. Get clean
Women love it when a man keeps his room, car, clothes, and body clean. Staying organized shows that you are an adult capable of having a serious and committed relationship. You are proving that you deserve your girlfriend's time and attention.
Pay attention to the refrigerator, sink and bathroom. She will notice
Step 7. Be yourself
You want the girl to fall in love with you, not a version you read on a website. Do you like Star Wars? Love a football game? Are you vegetarian? Don't hide these aspects. After all, you deserve to be loved for the person you are.
Step 8. Surprise her
Show how much you care about your girlfriend doing beyond what she expects. Exceed any expectations.
- For example, if the girl asks for help with an after-school project, do more than she asked, get all the materials in advance, and show up ready to help. She will be surprised and impressed if you do more than she expected.
- Surprise her with things she likes to show you pay attention. Send flowers to her house, bring lunch to work, or buy tickets to a show she wants to go to.