Everyone is different. While some people only care about looks, many others are looking for a partner who is much more than just a pretty face. Both men and women prefer to be involved with partners who take care of themselves, are confident and emotionally open with others. Therefore, you will be in the spotlight if you learn how to behave and treat others with respect.
Part 1 of 3: Making yourself as desirable as possible
Step 1. Cultivate a strong social life that involves your emotional side
Communication skills are one of the ten most attractive traits in a potential partner, for both men and women, and you will demonstrate this quality if you adopt a receptive and communicative posture. Maintain positive relationships with people you meet throughout your life. By being friendly and honest and showing that you are always willing to help, you will have someone to support you in times of need.
- Practice active listening. Active listening is about taking the time to pay attention to what someone is saying. The purpose here is not to suggest solutions to other people's problems, but to show that you care and empathize, listening to the other person's concerns. To communicate truly effectively, listen on an emotional level, not just a physical one.
- Be honest. Admit your own mistakes. Instead of hiding something you're ashamed of, share it with a friend or family member. This demonstrates that you are not afraid to expose your own insecurities and are willing to seek help whenever necessary, which will help you gain the trust and respect of those who matter.
- Keep in touch with friends. These days, thanks to social networks like Facebook, it's very easy to keep in touch with old friends and colleagues. From time to time, send a message or call these people to find out how they are doing or invite them to chat about the time that has passed. Letting some friends fall by the wayside can be very easy, especially when starting a family or starting a new job, but find a balance between these activities.
- Participate in social gatherings. Parties, celebrations and other social activities are great ways to stay in touch with friends and family and show that you care. If you are having difficulty finding free time, reserve a time in your calendar. If you don't have time to meet with each person individually, organize your own social gathering and invite everyone you know.
- Help those in need. Build trust with friends and family by offering help in times of need. It could be something as simple as keeping company in a difficult time or helping someone plan a wedding. When we help others, we are building a group of people who will be willing to support us whenever we need it.
Step 2. Get the education you need
A university degree and other forms of higher education are necessary for many higher-paying professions and provide a variety of career opportunities. Studies show that people with at least a bachelor's degree earn 65% more than workers who only studied through high school. Take advantage of this financial benefit to develop the stability people look for in a relationship.
- Talk to your advisor regularly. Your college-assigned advisor should help you throughout your academic career. Talk to him whenever you have questions about the profession you plan to pursue: he can suggest classes that will be useful even after college, extracurricular activities that will look good on the curriculum, and internships that will provide real-world experience.
- Take classes on how to succeed in college. Many colleges offer courses to help new students prepare for all the work ahead, with study methods, research tips, assignments and cultivating the right mindset, and planning techniques. The course is not usually mandatory, so talk to your advisor if you are interested in this class.
Step 3. Plan your career
Leave college with the same motivation and determination with which you entered. Talk to your advisor and ask for suggestions from good companies to look for your first job after graduation. Don't get too comfortable when you land that job - advancing professionally is an ongoing process. Motivated racing toward your desired career is a great way to demonstrate a commitment to lifelong stability-a quality desired by both men and women, according to recent studies.
- Turn career planning into an annual event. Every year, take the time to assess your professional life. Don't get into the habit of evaluating it only when you're ready for a new job: keeping a regular check on it will help you track your progress and identify new opportunities available.
- Regular planning will also help you identify your likes and dislikes about your current job. What would you like to change? What would you rather do? What do you consider absolutely necessary in a career? Ask yourself these questions to get a better idea of the next steps you should take.
- Review the skills you've learned, both in and out of your current job. We sometimes forget that we acquired a variety of skills in college that can be useful in many different markets, not just in our field of education. In addition, there are several skills related to your current job that could also be put to practice in careers you've never considered. Think about the activities you do at work that you learned about in college, and consider whether they could add value to your resume or motivation letter.
- Set professional goals. Whenever you assess personal wants and needs for the coming year, update goals related to your job and career. Setting goals is the best way to create a plan to help you achieve the career you want.
Step 4. Be financially responsible
It's never too early to start thinking about savings. Once out of college, start making long-term financial decisions.
- Talk to an accountant or financial advisor. The consultant will help you develop a plan to pay off any existing debts or to save the money needed to purchase your first property.
- Cultivate a good credit history. Apply for a credit card and start accumulating account balance as soon as possible. Pay all card bills on time to avoid interest charges and debt accumulation. Paying off student loans and other loans will also help you get good credit in the “square”.
- Set a budget. Stick to a monthly budget to avoid overspending, especially in the toughest months right after college graduation.
Step 5. Live by your own personal values
According to some studies, honesty and seriousness have a direct impact on how attractive we are to others. During life, never forget your core values. If you value family and plan to have children one day, make decisions that allow you the time to do so. If spirituality plays an important role in your life, don't give up a belief to get a job. Following your own values gives you a sense of personal fulfillment and connection with others, which makes life worthwhile and makes you serious.
Part 2 of 3: Keeping Looking Good
Step 1. Wear appropriate clothing for your body type
The same pieces of clothing can look amazing on one person and ridiculous on another, so identify your body type and wear clothes that enhance your figure.
- If you have the most common body shape, the trapeze type, (with shoulders wider than the waist and lean, defined legs), the options are numerous. Even pieces that are a little big or too tight will look good on this body type.
- In the case of the V-shaped body, with wider than average shoulders and a noticeably thinner waist, shirts with horizontal stripes or V-necks can accentuate their overall characteristics. You may need to buy a special size, such as slim fit clothing, but skinny garments are likely to be a little too tight for your body type.
- For more rectangular or less defined bodies, add and accentuate the definition whenever possible. Wear layered garments, such as knit shirts and jackets. Tighter pants can make the upper body, dressed in layers, look wider. Consider slim fit pieces so that the clothes don't look awkward in the silhouette.
- If you have a more visible tummy, divert attention from this area by wearing black clothes, as this color slims down. Vertical stripes can also help you look slimmer. Avoid ties, turtlenecks, and other items that can make the upper body look "squeezed".
- Find a good tailor. He will be able to take your measurements and adjust each piece of clothing so that it fits your body better.
Step 2. Use accessories
Wearing the right accessories can make someone stand out in a crowd. Choose items that match the outfit you're wearing.
- Mix and match prints. If you want to put on a tie or scarf, make sure the colors and patterns don't conflict with the rest of the outfit. You should not wear a vertically striped tie with a horizontal striped shirt, or neon socks with formal pants.
- Color contrast can work well when planned. A tie with a complementary color to the shirt might draw attention to your face, for example.
- Choose your shoes carefully. They can save or destroy a look, just like a hat or scarf. Choose shoes that are appropriate for the situation (such as dress shoes for a business meeting) and preferably match them with the colors of the clothes.
- If you wear glasses, choose frames that accentuate your face's strengths and mask features you don't like so much. As well as the body type, the shape of the face will determine which frames will look good and which will look awkward.
Step 3. Keep yourself well-groomed
Cut your hair regularly to avoid looking unkempt and unkempt. Likewise, shave or trim your beard according to your style.
- If you want to grow your hair, wear a hat or keep your hair tied to show off a well-groomed look during the growth process.
- Avoid deodorants and body sprays with excessively strong perfumes, people should only smell you when they are close to you. Also, you never know when someone will be allergic to this type of product.
- Wash clothes regularly and iron any pieces that are wrinkled. Poorly ironed clothes draw attention negatively and can give the impression that a person doesn't care about their appearance.
Step 4. Get in shape.
Exercise regularly to keep in shape and avoid extra pounds. You don't have to become a marombeiro, but the ability to do different exercises, such as walking, swimming or jogging, will help you prepare for any other activity that comes your way.
- Exercising is not just about going to the gym. Doing more housework or leaving the car at home to walk to the supermarket are also beneficial health measures.
- Practice yoga or stretching while watching television. This is an easy way to improve health and flexibility while engaging in less healthy activity.
- Stand up more often. Sitting for too long can hurt your spine and affect your posture. Whenever possible, use the computer or do your chores standing up to relieve your spine and burn off some calories.
Step 5. Take care of hygiene
Needless to say, hardly anyone is happy with a stinky person, even if they have only a slight unpleasant odor. Taking care of your hygiene will also help you stay healthy and prevent acne and infections.
- Brush your teeth two to three times a day, the exact number of times will depend on your dentist's recommendations. Talk to him to understand how often and for how long to brush, learn how to floss, and get other tips for keeping a white smile, clean teeth, and fresh breath.
- Shower regularly. Daily bathing is not strictly necessary to keep you clean and healthy (and too much bathing can even be harmful to your skin and the healthy bacteria that live in it). The amount of bathing needed will depend on your body chemistry, climate, activity level, and what you do for a living. Go ahead if you feel like you need a shower to get rid of the sweaty smell, but don't be afraid to skip a day if you want.
Part 3 of 3: Showing off your personality
Step 1. Be confident
Self-confidence can influence our performance in different areas of life, while insecurity can affect our mood and be identified by other people through body language.
- Develop self-confidence. Thinking positively, making positive affirmations daily, and not comparing yourself to others can all help you build the confidence you need to be as attractive as possible.
- While some women like to feel that they have a man in control, don't assume that all women are interested in this type of behavior. There is a fine line between taking charge and simply demonstrating confidence in yourself and your actions.
Step 2. Show respect
Nothing turns women (or anyone else) off more than a rude and arrogant man. Be respectful, not just to her but to everyone around you.
- Avoid making cheap pick-up lines and being thrown too far, this gives the impression that you are only interested in a physical relationship. For example: "I lost my phone. Can I have yours?"
- Open doors and pay the bill if you like, but don't be offended if a girl would prefer you not to be such a gentleman. The acts of chivalry indicate a level of inequality or difference between the sexes, and many women prefer to be treated as equals.
- When a woman expresses a wish or opinion, don't try to convince her to change her mind. Respect her as a person.
- Some men follow the girls and hit them aggressively. Keep in mind that this kind of persecution repulses the overwhelming majority of women.
Step 3. Take initiative without dominating the situation
If you ask what a girl would like to do on a date and she doesn't give a definitive answer, plan something! Anything will be better than indecision. Also, your suggestions might inspire her to come up with more ideas.
- For example, you could say, "Hey, I just remembered there's a new art exhibit down the street. Want to take a look?"
- Bars, cafes or parks are great ideas.
Step 4. Be charming
Charming people always grab attention and win over almost everyone with their friendly and attractive personalities.
- Be witty. Adding a little wit to the conversation demonstrates a certain ironic intelligence that everyone would like to have. However, be careful not to force too much snide comments into the subject and spoil the conversation - you'll give the impression that you're insensitive or overly vain if you spend all your time being cute.
- Have a sense of humor. Everyone loves to laugh! Start slowly to test the girl's sense of humor, as pushing the limits of good taste is an easy way to ruin your reputation and whatever credibility you've built up.
- Avoid making fun of particularly sensitive subjects such as sexuality, politics or religion.
Step 5. Really talk
Discover the girl's favorite movie, hobbies, ideal date or type of upbringing she's had. You should get to know her as a person and a good subject can provide insights for both sides of the conversation. Some good subjects include:
- "How's college going? I thought I'd never get my degree."
- "What did you want to be when you were a kid? Did college provide that opportunity?"
- "Have you lived here a long time? I think this town has its ups and downs."
- "Have you thought about moving to another state? Where would you go?"
Step 6. Be kind
Show that you have a caring side, whether with friends or family. Even if you are a very sarcastic person, demonstrating that you are also capable of feeling joy or love makes you a much more attractive person.
- Help people who need support. Opportunities to support someone are numerous and will demonstrate your willingness to help others. For example, help someone reach the highest shelf in a store, or a person who looks lost and needs information.
- Offer to pay for a meal or hold the door for the girl. However, do this out of sheer kindness and not out of pre-set expectations from one of you.
- Say "please" and "thank you", education takes us far when it comes to showing respect.
- Don't be kind to the girl you're into and rude to the rest of the world - she'll see that!
Step 7. Don't create irrational expectations
Gifts, such as chocolates or flowers, can help you attract some women, but remember that they are just gifts and that no one owes them anything in return. No woman wants the company of a man who complains, begs, or gets angry when he doesn't get what he wants, or someone who feels entitled to something in return for a gesture or gift.
Step 8. Know when to step back
Not every woman will be interested in your efforts, and that's normal! We all have personal preferences and maybe you're not her type. If your initiatives don't have the desired effect on a particular girl, she's likely not interested.
You can't please everyone. While you can customize your approach to the impression you have of a person, don't change who you are because of a failure in love. This is dishonest and shows insecurity
- Learn to interpret body language. Some subtle physical movements, such as pulling away or looking away, may show discomfort with the encounter.
- Kindness is a trait that everyone should have. While it makes you a good person, it is not a unique quality that alone deserves the attention of the opposite sex.